How To Be Happy and Stay Positive

This post is all about how you can become happier and how to stay positive. Learn to be happy with what you have, on your own, even when you’re not feeling happy. Stay productive, be happy and stay positive always, by adding these tips to your daily routine.

Often we find ourselves looking for happiness in the future. We say, ‘if I get this, I will be so happy’ or ‘if I get that Job, wow I will be the happiest’ or ‘oh my God, if I get that raise / promotion, my life will be so much happier.’ What we do not realize is that the key to being happy is in the NOW. If I am unable to make myself happy now by being grateful with whatever I have and I am, how can I be happy when I get what I am yearning for? Even when you get those desires fulfilled, you will find yourself yearning for something else. It is an endless cycle. The core mechanism of life is desire and that’s how we evolve and life evolves. Our present / now is all that matters and we need to BE happy now - in the present moment. 

Happiness is not a key that you switch on and the light is on until you switch it off. It’s a constant work in progress. But a habit that we can acquire and that changes our energy and it is said that then we attract more happier and pleasant experiences.

Only I Know My Sh*t!

Who can tell YOU how to be happy? Who knows you better than you? No one. I mean, I can tell you what makes me happy. Everyone will suggest things from their perspective and experience. Yes, there will be many things that will be common, and there is no harm to start with them until you get a foothold and sink your roots deep in it.

But the point is - what is unique for you? And please don’t say that there is nothing unique to you because this is not true at all. Why? Well, each one of us is unique. My God, even our fingerprints are unique. Is there anyone like you? No. There are no duplicates in real life. Look closely and see that every animal and every bird is different from each other. Every stone is unique, every cloud is unique, every ant is unique, every cell is unique. So, only you will know your sh*t because you are unique. 

Isn’t it better that you figure it out for yourself - what actually makes you happy? How can you do that? Well, yes this is where I may be able to help, if you allow me. If you cannot imagine at this very moment, moments where you can BE happiness, then read on as the following is what has worked for me. Then again, there is no such thing as ‘I cannot think or imagine’. You just have to do it – deliberately. Deliberately imagine the happy life you desire to experience. Make a conscious effort. This point I will discuss later but first thing’s first - record all those moments from earlier in your life that have made you happy.

Take Stock of Your Happy Moments

Try sitting down and write – yes put pen to paper and list what makes YOU happy.

When you write, you are forced to think about those moments in your life that have made you happy in the past. Yes, your past. Do not exclude your childhood. Perhaps it was dancing in the rain, running in the fields, watching birds sing, giggling with your friends, reading a book, drawing or painting, playing a game, playing with a pet, dancing your heart out, singing your heart’s desire… anything…just look back and start making notes now … from then to now.

You will be amazed at the list you come up with that will make you realize that there are no dearth of moments that can make you happy.

Realize That Your Happiness is Independent of External Stimuli

The key is that you have to create such moments for yourself. No one else will come and gift you these moments. Your happiness is independent of external stimuli. You are not dependent on anyone for your very own happiness. That’s because even that stimuli is not effective if you are not ready to enjoy it, appreciate it and make it count as a moment to cherish.

The previous writing exercise will instill a sense of gratitude within you, if you allow it to. You will be so grateful for all those moments that have made you happy that you will wish to create such moments in your life again and again.

Gratitude is Key

Being in gratitude itself changes one’s energy. You can try it. Every day take a stock of all the small-small things that you are grateful for: it maybe your comfortable pillow, your favourite shoe, your favourite food, your cell phone, your favourite pen, your car, the list will be endless. Try it. 😊

Now, let’s talk about how you can deliberately create happy moments. 

Deliberate Creation is The Way

Now, think & imagine answers to the questions, ‘how can I be happy?’ or ‘What makes me happy?’. Once you know what moments have made you happy or imagine what moments can make you happy, go ahead and create such moments.

Yes, you read that correctly. Create them for yourself. You see, life is all about movement and action. We are the creators, and only we can create the life that we desire for ourselves. These lines are taken from our book – Is Life As We Know It? By Palak and Pooja. Yup! This book is written by my sister Pooja and I. It has taught us a lot and has opened up our minds to endless possibilities. We are still learning and will continue to do so.

Should you wish to read our book, here is the link. You may also join us on all our social media platforms such as Instagram, YouTube, etc. Find us anywhere - @palakandpooja. We’d be happy to have you join us on our journey as life enthusiasts, and hope to inspire you to look at life differently and positively.

So, please remember that if you want to make things work for you, move that butt. Movement is key. You will never know until you try. Regardless of the outcome, action is important. If it worked - great, and if it didn’t…well, at least you have tried. You owe it to yourself. In life, you are on your own. Here I would like to quote Priyanka Chopra Jonas, from her book Unfinished ‘… whatever my failures, they haven’t been for lack of effort’. And, this makes one feel good about oneself.

Newness Brings Fresh Energy

If you are fed up of a routine, change it. Deliberate creation is the key. Decide every morning, what else is possible for you today?

Change the way you do things. Everything - every small thing. Get up in the morning from the other side of the bed if you can, don’t do the thing that you always have done first. So if you get up from your bed and draw your curtains as the first thing in the morning, after which you go to the bathroom, go to the bathroom first, then come out and draw your curtains. If you have coffee and sit in a particular place, change your usual seating place. Do little things differently as this way you will experience newness in the moment. You will find it refreshing. If you take a certain route to work, leave a little early and try another route. Play – play around to make your life more interesting. 

Find ways, there is no dearth of possibilities of what you can do. This will change your energy and help you be happy and productive.  

But, How To Be Happy When You Are Not?

The challenge is how to be happy when you are not happy - when you don’t want to be happy at that moment. Yes, there will be moments when it is hard. It can be very hard to bring yourself out of a rut. These moments are inevitable in life.

The good news is that there will also come a time when you will have had it. When you find yourself saying – that’s enough, I don’t want to feel this way anymore! Like the cork bobbing up in water, finally your strong desire to come out of that state of unhappiness will push you out of it. 

Well, here I can only speak based on my experiences. When I am not in a happy place, I find myself first letting it out by talking to my loved ones, and then writing about it. These help me get a better perspective about the situation that is making me unhappy.  After that I find myself engaging in things that I like to do such as listening to songs/music, painting, decluttering, cooking a new dish, re-arranging stuff or re-organizing a corner of the house. Movement/activity is what I prioritize.

There are times when I am very upset. In such cases, I give myself time. I allow myself to stay in that state till I cannot take it anymore and want to just come out of it. It’s a process, I guess.

Seek Help

It is always best to take professional help from psychologists/therapists who are skilled at this and can help us. It’s so simple – if your kidney has an issue you go to a Nephrologist; if you have an issue with your nerves, you go to a neurologist. Similarly, when we have issues with our emotions and feelings or our mind, then we go to a specialist called Psychologist.

By the way, Psychologists do not administer medicines, Psychiatrists do. You can chat up with the Psychologist/Counselor and they will share with you tools on how you can create happiness for yourself and BE happy. They will help you deal with and sort out problems in your life, effectively.

You also have the option of finding some online support groups that has people with similar issues who support each other. A little google search should open up some great avenues for you to reach out for help.

How To Become Happier?

And if you are simply looking to just enhance and increase the existing joy in your life, well I hope that this article gave you new ways to become even happier. 😊 And do share your happiness with others, as sharing happiness amplifies happiness for you AND them.  

Please do not think that I am saying that ‘you should be satisfied with what you have’, or that ‘desire brings in unhappiness, so limit your desires.’ No, I definitely am not saying that. In fact desire is the only way life evolves. One cannot stop desiring at all - the desire to live, the desire to breathe, the desire to eat food when hungry, the desire to get what you want - it is continuous and helps us evolve as human beings. I am simply saying ‘be grateful’ and count your blessings as you move along in life.  

Stay blessed and happy always.